- Pregnancy
- College graduation
- Job applications
- House sale
Transitions are always difficult for me, but even more so are the in-betweens, the lulls. I've never been good at summer breaks, Christmas breaks, or breaks period. My mind speaks too loud, my boredom becomes depression as I search for things to throw myself into to attempt to keep myself busy. This usually results in overcommitting myself and eventually returning to my normal overwhelmed state. It's what I do, it's what I know.
But now, with a bachelors degree under my figurative belt and my growing belly making wearing actual belts unbearable, I am once again in-between. Waiting. Waiting on responses to job applications, on our mortgage company to do their job, on time so that I can meet my unborn child. I know in my head that I should be patient and enjoy the time off to myself. After all I've actually had time to read non-text books for the first time since high school and I know time to myself will be a rare commodity once baby Bodkin enters the world. And yet here I am am, over eager to be back in the real world, to be earning a real paycheck again, and to feel useful. The house is too quiet, too far away for people and activity. I should be more productive, use my time wisely. But I sit, stuck in the lull, stagnating.
For once I hope these words come back to bite me in the arse.
